events - 2

Dun dun DUUUUUUUUNNN!

On Friday morning, Bryant and I leave for Sioux Falls, South Dakota, from where we'll ride to the start of RAGBRAI 2014 in Rock Valley, Iowa. OMG you are so excited, so here's some stuff:

• the route: http://ragbrai.com/routemaps/2014-route-maps/
• me being sarcastic: https://twitter.com/runningchunk
• me posting sarcastic photos: http://instagram.com/onedayfishsale/

And in general, search for #ragbrai on whatever social media network to get an idea of what's going on. See you in a week or so!

Today's race was epic. First, the results:

The field of "athletes":

The weather was perfect for a change. This was good because between people getting lost on the way (I realize I said "park" instead of "campground"), and maybe one or two people having more or less just rolled out of bed, it was relatively pleasant standing in the parking lot. Once everybody showed up, we gathered around while I described the course using phrases like "it sort of goes," "you kind of turn," and "giant ravine."

At precisely 11:37, we took off up the hill. Deidre, Amy, Nancy, and Andi formed a nearly-impenetrable lead pack until Dave flipped the hidden battery assist switch on the stroller his son was riding in. I stayed back, checking once or twice for lost people behind me. At the first mile mark, I finally dropped G after making him laugh, but didn't keep my place for long, as Kristin motored by with a look of determination on her face.

Coming around the big loop, the final climb inspired whining from runners and amused looks from disc golfers. The ravine section was reported to be no problem, though the campground loop was universally demoralizing. At least there were no lawnchair hecklers. Ann and Duncan made up 100% of the official event spectators, and directed runners toward the finish line.

The finish included some great feats, including a seriously impressive effort by Kelly (carrying a 15-pound rucksack), a last-minute breakaway by Colin, and Martin wearing all the clothing he started with. Not to mention Steve and Rob carrying an extra 30 pounds each, Heather making a solid finish even after revealing her mystery identity, and Cayce figuring out this running thing well in advance of the end. I'm sure all of the runners who finished before me were equally amazing, so cheers to all you fast people too.

With everyone at the finish, we posed for the classy photo above and headed in to the American Legion for delicious Old Style (call me about sponsorship, Heileman's). After the awards ceremony in which Nancy and I disposed of all the race freebies we had socked away, we continued with more drinking and bullshitting. Also there was this:

Amy tagged some photos on Instagram, including these:

So this was fun. You guys were great, and you'd all better come back next year.

[I have no idea why it took me so long to post this. The 2012 runningchunk.com 5K took place on October 6.]

Wind, rain, and snow. Hangovers.

Five brave souls showed up for this year's event. Another participated in an alternate dimension. All lived to tell the tale. Here are some testimonials:

"Why can't I just have pants that won't fall down when I'm running?" - Josh

"I hate you." - Matt

"I got home at 3:00 AM." - James

"This is the worst." - Nancy

"There are fewer sewage lagoons than I was expecting." - Dan

After briefly standing around in the bitter cold, we gathered at the start. I explained the course layout, and James reassured everyone that it wasn't nearly as confusing as my explanation. Official start time was 11:33, and we slogged up the first hill as a group.

Cresting the hill, James and Nancy pulled away from me, and I pulled away at the waistband of my thermal tights. A rule of running says that you never try out new gear during a race, and wearing my biking tights that morning wasn't a good idea.  

I, and likely the others, buckled down and tried to ignore the wind and mixed snow and rain. Near the end, Nancy started walking after a big gust of snow hit her, and I thought for sure I'd see her in my pickup peeling out of the parking lot shortly thereafter. But she got to the end just after I did, though we both arrived at the finish line to see James waiting, bored. I think he was filing his fingernails.

Danno loped in shortly thereafter, followed by Matt, who impressed everyone with his first race performance. G is said to have run in a different time zone and completed a 5K in some super-human time, but forfeited by not consuming the mandatory bottle of Old Style after finishing.

So here are the results, as official as they come:

• James: 28:49
• Josh:  30:26
• Nancy: 30:58
• Dan:   37:18
• Matt:  44:36

Thanks to all you schmoes who ran. See you next [this] year!

On Saturday, I competed in a mountain bike race for some reason. The 2013 Great Deer Chase had 15-mile and 28-mile courses, and in my post-RAGBRAI euphoria, I decided it would be a good idea to enter the long race.

Coming down to the actual event on very little training (and having chased only one deer while pre-riding the course), I switched to the 15-mile event. And it was a blast.

We started at the north end of Calumet, to the amusement of the overachieving bar patrons already in their places at 11:00 AM. A pickup paced us part of the way to the Swedetown trails, where the race heated up. There were probably close to 150 riders between the long and short events, but there was plenty of room to get spread out before the ATV trails turned to single-track.

Much of the short course was wide grassy paths, which I didn't really care for since they tend to be soft and slow, at least for a big dude like me. These were the only sections where I really wished for some kind of suspension on my bike, as the clumpy grass over rough soil made for a bouncy ride.

Heading into the single-track sections put a smile on my face. I love the level of concentration that's needed to go fast without hitting a tree or nailing a big rock. Crank a little, look, steer, shift your weight, feather the brakes, slide the rear on that corner. I'd put the clear lenses in my sunglasses, and that really helped see what was going on in the shade. I clipped one or two small trees, but for the most part had a smooth ride through the woods.

Between passing some people and being passed by a few, I was on my own for the last third of the race. I started to consider the possibility of being last, but remembered that I didn't see the dude on the completely thrashed '80s mountain bike. A podium in the Rigid 26er category (completely made up, unfortunately) seemed possible. Before I knew it, I was turning onto the pavement for a three block sprint to the finish next to the Michigan House. My time was 1:20:10, good enough to place 34th of 67 men, and 5th of 6 guys in my age group.

Nancy and Zoe cheered for me, and Zoe helped me eat post-race grapes and cookies. We watched a few more riders come in, and then headed north to the art fair in Copper Harbor.

Back next year? For sure. Somebody please stop me from buying a real mountain bike.

I'm leaving early tomorrow morning for a silly ride across Iowa with 15,000 of my closest friends.

Connectivity will be spotty, so I'll be updating on Google+:

• me on Google+
• my RAGBRAI stuff on Google+
• other RAGBRAI stuff on Google+

I survived the Surgeon 100.

I did the metric race, which was "100" kilometers through the Ottawa National Forest including plenty of climbing in and out of the Sturgeon River Gorge. My (unofficial) time was 5:24:31, which seems like long time to be on a bike riding through the woods, but honestly didn't feel too bad. That time put me somewhere around 5th out of 14 for the metric, depending on how you count the guys from Minnesota who started in the wrong time zone (heh). Which was pretty amazing to me, as my goal was just to finish before the course cut-off.

This photo was at the roll-out on Forest Highway 16. I just eked ahead of the second pack of riders at about Mile 5, and that was my position for the rest of the race. Kinda lonely, but then nobody else had to endure me singing the many ass-soreness-themed songs I came up with.

My ride was a 2010 Redline Conquest cyclocross bike, and it made the trip with no complaining. The gearing was a bit steep for me on this course (36-27 is my low gear), but I made it only having to walk for a big sandy area. Hills were a serious challenge though, and a few rocky sections had me wishing for a mountain bike. At least I was faster than this guy:

Besides being hilly, the course ranged from sandy to rocky to loose gravel. The cyclocross bike made the best of the gravel rollers, and before my enthusiasm for being in the woods could pass through bordeom to utter contempt, I was making the turn back onto the pavement for the final five miles.

I was cheered at the finish area, and was promptly administered a delicious pulled pork sandwich by Dr. Jen. A few beers and some stretching had me feeling pretty good, and I enjoyed hanging out and listening to the war stories of fellow racers.

Thanks to James and Heather - this was a great race. Thanks also to Nancy, who calmed my pre-race nerves and cheerled for me at the half-way checkpoint. I'll definitely be back next year!

Nancy ran the Journeys Half Marathon in 2:08:27, which was awesome.

I ran the Journeys 5K in 28.38, which was hilarious but acceptable given zero training.

I have photos somewhere.

Thank you for your attention.